When we were in high school, we had periodic career seminars. We took tests to find out what color our parachutes were, gift and talent inventories, computer surveys. We shadowed people who had jobs we might like to do someday and were pressured at the tender age of 16, 17, 18 to choose a path on which we would travel down for the rest of our lives.
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Looking for a way to bring peace and joy to your day?
Seasons of Joy is my 10-week seasonal guidebook to add rhythm and fun to your daily routine. Each guidebook has ten weeks' worth of circle times, stories, arts, crafts, and handwork, painting, playtime activities and more!
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Things have been kind of quiet here this past week. Not just on the blog, but in real life as well. You see, as I get closer and closer to the babies’ first birthday, I have to remember that November 23 is the anniversary of something else as well– the day I went into heart failure. The day I was diagnosed with peripartum cardiomyopathy. You turned my wailing into dancing; Today I am thankful for my husband, who has stood by me in sickness and in health, for better and for worse. He works tirelessly to serve the people of his parish and is just as willing and eager to serve those outside of his church call. He is an awesome father and husband, and there’s nothing sweeter than seeing him with a baby or one of our older children. Every time I think of you I thank God for you. (Philippians 1:3)Today, on the feast of All Souls, I am thankful for those who have gone before me. For my husband’s grandmother, who died this past year and was such a gentle and loving woman. For the three little babies we never held in our arms: Mary Elizabeth, Samuel Paul, and Maria Hope. For my stepmother, who was killed by a drunk driver when I was a senior in high school. For my grandmother, who was a huge loving influence on me growing up. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. (Colossians 3:15) Tonight, as I have one sleeping on my left side and one on my right, I am thankful for my two growing thriving babies.
Growth spurt? Change of season? Teething? Planets aligned just so? Who knows. All I know is that I have been stuck under one nursing baby after another pretty much nonstop all day long. So, in no particular order, here is how I pass the time. 1. Cleaning by proxy. 2. Googling myself. 3. Making a Word doc list of all the stuff I used to do that I really liked but I don’t do anymore. Sigh. I feel like my posts have been so negative lately. I’ve shared my struggles and my solutions, and I’ve tried to do it in a way that shows my hopefulness and joy. And I suppose part of it could be the season. There’s something about autumn that draws me inward towards introspection and it just seems more difficult to post here. But there’s also just been this feeling of something missing. A sense of nostalgia. I miss the way things used to be.
“Holding the space” is one of those Waldorf/hippie mama/gentle parenting catch phrases that gets thrown around a lot. We all nod and smile knowingly and look wise, but it can be a little difficult to truly wrap our brains around it. I know I’ve tossed it into conversation before, but I don’t think I ever really truly knew what it meant. That is, before 5 AM this morning. The babies have decided that now that they are 10 months old, they don’t need to sleep anymore. EVER. Not at night. Not during the day. Today I am making a very public confession/announcement in the hopes that it helps me let go and move on. I am not a Waldorf homeschooler.I’m not happy about it and I feel like a great big failure, but after three months of trying to fit a square peg in a round hole, I am admitting that I just can’t do it anymore. I can’t do it with my seventh grader, who just doesn’t respond to it anymore. I can’t do it with my fifth grader, who was rather creatively using all that time I spent on other children’s main lessons as “mess around and do pretty much anything but work” time.
FOR TODAY I am thankful… |
Rain on the green grass,
Rain on the trees, Rain on the rooftops, But not on me!  Sincerity
2 Corinthians 1:12 For our boast is this, the testimony of our conscience, that we behaved in the world with simplicity and godly sincerity, not by earthly wisdom but by the grace of God, and supremely so toward you.
Love begins by taking care of the closest ones - the ones at home.
~Mother Teresa |
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