A good morning starts with you.

OK, it’s home truth time.

I hit upon this a little yesterday, but wanted to elaborate. You see, there are lots of things you can do to start your day right. You can create a schedule. You can hone your routines. You can find songs, set the stage, be prepared, or do any number of things. But there’s one thing you simply cannot do, no matter how hard you try.

You can’t control anyone but yourself.

You can’t make your children wake up happy.

You can’t make your spouse forget the sleep button on the alarm exists.

The only person in your house that you can control is you.

Now, you might beĀ  shaking your head and saying “Duh, Annette. I’m the mama. They’ll do what I say and they’ll like it.” To which I would reply, gently, that this simply isn’t true. Even if you could somehow physically force your family to follow your rhythms and routines perfectly, you can’t force them to provide what I think is an essential ingredient for a good morning– a positive attitude.

Some mornings might be easy. You may wake up early, have some alone time, wake everyone up with a smile and a song, have a healthy breakfast in a pleasant atmosphere and find that they return it all in kind. What a blessing! It’s easy to find joy on a day like that.

But other mornings might not… no, WILL not… be so easy. You’ll wake up late to a mess left over from the night before. You won’t have time for a shower, your honey will have slept late and have to leave right away, and your children will be cross and find fault with every thing from breakfast to your very existence. And you know what? You have to find your joy on those days as well.

It’s not easy. And I’m not going to lie and say that on days like that, I haven’t joined the pity party and demanded that everyone shape up… except me. But, to be blunt, it’s your job to make a silk purse from a pig’s ear. It’s your job to redeem the day. To be blunt, someone has to suck it up and that someone is you.

Hold the space.

Let go of the imperfections and goals of perfection.

Don’t be afraid to call a do-over.

But remember– just as you are the keeper of the rhythms and routines, you are also the setter of the tone. It’s a heavy responsibility, and they won’t always go along with it. But that’s OK. You just do the best you can.

I’m wishing you the happiest of mornings, but when fate hands you a great big stinker, I’m also praying that you’ll be able to hold the space.

So tell me, what do you do to “reset” your morning when it starts off badly?